Текст книги "Womb Bloom"

Sailing to another part of the lagoon where the liana roots were stretching down to the water with tender love, don Margarito began to show off his ‘rooms’ to us: “Here’s my bedroom! Here’s my living room! And here’s my church where I come to pray”. He would often ask tourists from Europe and the States who had their own businesses and a certain status in society: “How much does your smile cost?” That would put them in a stupor.

Margarito shared another of his observations with us. He often lunched in a café where he would see one and the same picture. People dressed in Prada, wearing Rolexes, sitting with iPhones and iPads couldn’t even eat in peace. As soon as the waitress would bring them their order and they picked up their knife and fork the phone would start ringing and ringing and they had to put their food to the side and begin resolving various issues. “Bla bla bla!” – the voices got louder and louder while the lonely lunch pushed to the side got colder and colder…

***

Try to spend time in nature more often. Go to the forest, to the river, walk in parks. Don’t sit for days on end in front of the computer at home. Take yourself out for walks.

Nature is our truest and closest teacher.

Why did the ancients always turn to the elements, imitate animals and have the ability to communicate with them? They were at one with nature. And that is why they had power and knowledge.

With the appearance of televisions, telephones and computers we stopped feeling our body, being fully inside it, being conscious of it, and all our attention was now fixed on those black square holes. Where then is our juicy life, ripe as a papaya, bursting with feeling and bodily experiences? We have made it so bland and that’s why it has become so depressing…

For many years I searched for a spiritual guide who I would come to with my notebook to hear and note down all the wisdom of the world from, and who would give me the answers to all my questions. Until one day I realized something very important; this teacher is already in front of me in the form of Nature (from the Latin natus – born), the place we have all emerged from in pure form.

Nature is our reminder of a past paradise, of the purity which people were once filled with, which was lost with time. When people began to cut down forests, siphon off raw materials, pollute rivers they created hell for themselves. They don’t live but survive in this hell without clean air, clean water or love for the earth which they walk on…

Back in Moscow from the lagoon, after standing in a traffic jam for 4 hours, I realised that a person who really loves themselves will never live in an asphalted megapolis.

***

After living in Moscow for 8 years I realized that at some point I had stopped feeling that spontaneous happiness that had always been close by. Its departure was barely noticeable. Poco a poco, bit by bit, it was swallowed by the emptiness of the big city. Nothing could make me truly happy. I couldn’t be carefree and open when I laughed, I couldn’t even feel sad. I was always preoccupied by something. Plans have the habit of never ending.

Don Margarito told me: “If you don’t feel happiness, you need to change your life.” That’s when, in the lagoon, in Oaxaca’s mountains, on the Cascadas Magicas waterfall, I once again remembered the feeling of being a Child. It was like a gulp of fresh air leading to the long-awaited feeling of lightness. The stones taught me the meaning of unhurriedness and fullness of life, water taught me smoothness, fluidity, continuity… I was filled with the four elements.

***

I heard the stones sing,

With an open heart to the waterfall,

And I opened up to feel myself ring,

In joyous freefall.

***

Nature is always positive and only human beings are prone to negative thinking and destruction. Only people find it important to be important, more important than those around them and to have a VIP card or VIP service. No animal is interested in this. And even when these people are in a beautiful place they can’t fully delight in it because they only care about taking as many selfies as possible to put up on the internet so that they can boast to their friends about where they were and seem more important once again.

When I was boarding the plane not long ago I saw the following scene before me: a Frenchman was sent to queue along with everyone else. He kept showing his gold and VIP cards along with his indignation, but the Mexican police sent him to the end of the queue nevertheless. What difference, it would seem, is there between sitting in a seat in the waiting area or in a seat on board the plane – the plane won’t take off until all the passengers are on board. But personal importance does not allow us to accept the situation, to make peace with it and just smile. With time we learn that no matter how hard we try, our ego can’t ever be satisfied, and this sparks off a chain reaction of suffering.

Now there is more negative energy than positive in our world, and the negative energy swallows up the positive. It’s contagious. A person poisoned with negative energy tries to share it with others, making everyone around them ill with the same virus.

The megapolis is like a bubbling marsh full of frogs. If one of them decides to jump out, the others will drag it back to the bottom without fail. Believe me, they will take care of that. It’s so interesting that many who wanted to go with us on our expedition to places of power were not let out of the city. As soon as they started preparing for the journey, some urgent task or work that couldn’t be put off would appear or they would be offered a new position or simply not given leave on those dates. Babylon held them in its grip and didn’t want to let them go just like that.

***

Nature and its holy places are able to heal our bodies. Oases of purity untouched by civilization vibrating with harmonious music. First they start to clean us from the toxins of the city and then fill us up with grace and energy. Many people start feeling dizzy, throwing up or fainting in places of power. This is a manifestation of how dirtied and poisoned a person is. The cleansing process is taking place.

When I arrived at the Cascadas Magicas waterfall I felt that I would have to live here at least for half a year to fully purify myself from life in the city. I felt so at home in this wonderful, wild place, that a dream formed to bring my daughter here so that she could develop in these pure vibrations at one with nature. This would be especially important for her first few years of life. Then, when she grew up, she would make her own choice about where to live. Now I want to give her the best of what is in my power to give.

As my mentor Juan once said: “It is one’s fate to be born in the city, but to live in it is a choice.”

When I was pregnant I constantly wanted to run out of my flat; my baby girl was calling me to go to the forest and the lake, and I followed her call. I wanted to give birth in nature very much. Here among the welcoming birches, oaks and pine trees where it was so cosy.

***

In the mountains on herbalist Novarro’s ranch I discovered that nature has a feminine structure, that she is our Great Mother who takes care of every one of her children and that each child is equally dear to her. A mother can’t abandon her child. She loves her child selflessly and gives as much love as the child can absorb.

On the plane, flying over Amsterdam, we were watching a documentary about horses living in their natural habitat in the Dutch forests. One of the recently-born foals got so cold after swimming in water which hadn’t yet warmed up after the winter, that he could barely move his legs. Without functioning legs are a horse can’t survive in nature. The herd gathered around the foal and made a silent decision to go further. They couldn’t wait any longer for the young one to get up. They needed to go in search of food. The horses began walking away from the foal, and only his mother couldn’t leave him. She tried to help him get up again and again, supporting him, pushing him forward with her hoof, until he finally did so and began to take slow, shaky steps. Leaning on his mother, he caught up with the herd. This was a touching sight with showed a mother’s neverending love for her offspring.

It’s so strange that society teaches us from childhood to fence ourselves off from nature and even to be fearful of her, expecting that she will trick us out somewhere. Instead of opening up to and putting our trust in the Great Mother, we hide from her in our boxes and destroy her. Some countries are already becoming aware of this; the Netherlands are advocating cycling and walking instead of using cars more and more.

We are our own worst enemy; only we have the power to bring harm upon ourselves. Nature is impartial. She responds to how you interact with her. If you go into a swirling ocean just for the fun of it, without respect for this being, to prove to yourself that you’re a toughie, it can suck you up into the abyss. When an ocean is stormy it doesn’t allow you into its waters. The strong and foaming surf, like a barrier which is not easy to cross, acts as a silent sign that it’s better not to enter today. Nature does everything to protect us, but a disobedient child will always find new adventures.

Doing and being

Don Margarito said that there are two main states in a human: ser y hacer – doing and being. They are like 2 paths which need to be squeezed through.

Many years ago people were in the state of being, which is why they lived in harmony with nature, didn’t change anything and just were. When the state of doing began to take hold of them, people started to meddle in the natural balance by trying to change everything around themselves. They felt constantly unsatisfied with what they already had and began to forget the wonderful state of being. So, after creating civilizations, cities, building a load of business centres, offices and shops, we unlearned to simply accept what surrounds us, and most importantly those close to us.

We are in action the whole time and cannot stop because we’re constantly preoccupied by something and we want to remake everything, even those around us. We cannot simply be, observe and feel delight. We always need to rush somewhere to do something. Harmony looks at us from a far-away shore.

Have you noticed that little children are prone to taking everything apart? They show us adults that our Universe is made up of one and the same – of elementary particles like in the game Minecraft, where whole worlds are put together from small blocks. Everything which we produce with such zeal and then impart with so much importance doesn’t have any meaning in the large scale of things. Children break it all up and smash it into pieces, spontaneously leading us to the source to help us become less attached to things and to show us their essence.

To be…

***

The more a person distances themselves from nature, the more distant they become from everything around them. Often those who are not satisfied with their partner will not be satisfied with the next one, fifth or tenth one. It may turn out that no one suits them at all. All this happens because of the feeling of separation.

Your partner is also nature’s creation and a part of nature. Being part of her means to experience happiness and to accept your beloved as the manifestation of divine creation. You’re not going to feel bitter towards a crocodile because of the fact he eats all that he get his jaws on and hunts prey which he can manage to kill. Or towards a tiger because he hunts alone, creeping up to his prey and waiting in ambush. Or towards a snake because she is poisonous. The same goes for people; they are as they are.

Healers say that every person is born with their own animal totem, which can be seen through certain characteristics: physiognomy, body type, character, behaviour, actions. There can be several animals that show through. In antiquity healers would appoint a baby its totem according to the baby’s date of birth, the position of the stars and other factors. This totem was called to protect and give power to the person during their life’s course.

In Mexico there exist people called nagual who can turn into animalsin their dream body and even in their physical body. One such nagual who I managed to meet in meet in my life told me that it’s not necessary to fully turn into your totem. You can have eagle eyes, be as flexible as a snake, decisive as a tiger, that is, adopt the characteristics inherent to your totem.

In the Replege dance there are many movements that imitate animals. These practices offer a fresh perception of reality, a move away from the human ego and a new outlook on certain situations. It is so liberating to move like a monkey, crawl like a lizard, jump like a frog and fly like a bird. Liberating not to be limited by one’s image, which has become shabby after been worn incessantly for so many years. How tempting it is to sometimes throw off one’s old skin and turn into a new being, to fly out of one’s cocoon like a butterfly into a new life filled with colour.

Week 6

A revolution began inside my body. It was a struggle between two organisms which now had to exist together inseparably. And since I really wanted the baby to be born I needed to learn to accept everything that was happening with me. As soon as I tried to oppose anything, I would immediately receive a response 100 times stronger. It was the same as trying to fight myself.

We are able to protect ourselves from external influences. It is much easier to close yourself, cut yourself off from the external. But what can you do when this someone is inside you, moreover implanted in your body? You can’t run away, hide, switch off incoming calls or delete them from your friend list on Facebook. Here begins the discovery of LOVE.

My consciousness had never before been faced with this experience, which is why it wasn’t able to register or describe what was happening to it. All I could do was dance with the newcomer that had erupted into my life.

It’s an interesting experience to meet the unknown.

***

What does any spiritual practice start with? With cleansing.

And so the baby inside me began with a total cleanse of my body and consciousness. She taught me to choose healthy food and be clean. Now I could differentiate precisely between natural and non-natural products, live food from lifeless food, food filled with goodness from food carrying emptiness. Now I knew exactly what my organism wanted at any point in time and what food it needed. This knowledge was crystal clear.

The world opened up to me in a billion scents and enthralled my sense of smell. I was like the perfumer in Patrick Süskind’s novel Perfume. I now reacted to everything in two ways: nausea, no nausea. This reaction allowed me to separate wheat from chaff, truth from lies and what was original from what was fake. If I began to feel light nausea while talking to a person it meant that they were false and it didn’t pay for me to socialize with them.

Now after her birth my daughter continues helping me; she uncovers all masks and sees what lies inside people. If she starts crying while I am talking to someone this means that we should change the topic of conversation or stop talking completely. Sometimes she doesn’t even let me eat certain types of food. I open the fridge to get something and at that very moment she starts calling me loudly. I stop what I’m doing, go to her, and afterwards I don’t want to eat what I was planning to eat anymore. She ‘delays me’ to give my body the chance to make its own decision about whether it needs that food or not since the predilection and weakness for any kind of food surfaces faster than the understanding of what our organism wants in actual fact, which comes second in line.

Week 7

For us week 7 was marked by our first visit to the doctor who confirmed that I was pregnant. An abyss opened up before me: what was I to do next, how should I live?

The obstetrician gynaecologist gave me a long list of tests that I had to undergo. I didn’t know anything about them. Everything happening to me was my first experience. And I didn’t know what I should be doing or shouldn’t be doing.

All that was left for me to do was to listen to my heart.

None of the women sitting in the corridor had a smile on their faces. Jonny exclaimed: “My God! Each woman here is carrying a cosmos in her belly. New life pulses within each of them! So why are they all so burdened and sorrowful?”

Pregnancy – naturalness

Today’s society relates to pregnant woman as to some kind of weak and ill people: “Lie down, don’t get up, don’t do anything, drink tablets”. But the healer wise-women taught me that pregnancy is a very natural state for a woman to be in. If you accept this, then you will find it much easier to go through your pregnancy.

Life goes on!

Society creates a cult of abnormality and frailty around this state, but in actual fact pregnant women are much stronger and hardier than non-pregnant women. They have much more strength, vitality and health. Mother Nature gives us all this; she cares for and protects the mother-to-be and her child, releasing a colossal amount of resources to nurture the foetus and give birth to the baby. But fears block our power and don’t allow us to fully harness it. That’s why our task is to be brave and accept what was initially put into our body and help it to prepare for childbirth. Dance and breathing practices, exercises, massage and most importantly, a positive outlook, will help us with this. Everything starts with how you react to your pregnancy.

Ladies, it’s not worth reacting too emotionally to medical tests and checkups. They are not exact and can be 100% inaccurate, as is more often the case. But women can get so upset by the results and this can cause more harm than going for a checkup later than planned. The most important thing now is to be in a positive frame of mind and listen to the sensations inside you. Fear has the insidious quality of being contagious. Since a pregnant woman feels everything so many times stronger than usual, if fear comes into her it can grow to extreme proportions and throw her out of kilter, taking away her balance and calm. This is inadmissible in the state of pregnancy.

When we left nature for civilization, our female intuition weakened. We stopped listening to ourselves and the world around us.

Pregnancy and happiness come together, pouring into one another like milk and water. A loved one or an experienced friend who has already gone through pregnancy, or this book can help a woman feel this state. A lot of support is needed during pregnancy to evaluate any situation in a sober manner.

Be more optimistic. Trust your inner sensations… Put your hands on your belly, connect with your baby, and listen to her heartbeat. Smile to her. Love makes wonders. The more love, grace and joy you carry, the healthier and stronger your baby will be.

Cultivate happiness! What you are experiencing now is the most sacred state and event in a woman’s life blessed by the Universe.

The Chimera and the Sorceress

There’s an ancient proverb saying that two beings live in a woman – a Chimera and a Sorceress. They represent Destruction and Creation.

A Chimera is a stormy, raging woman harbouring conflict and destruction. Around her everything begins to fall apart, break, people fall ill and nasty things happen to them, business goes awry, things go wrong etc. This happens because she is always unhappy with something, scowling and in a bad mood, which is why she sucks energy from her surroundings.

The second part of a woman is the Sorceress. The world blossoms around her, people are happy, healthy, things run smoothly, magic is all around. This is because she lives in happiness. She smiles and lights up the world with her smile.

Maiden be joyful!

The essence of woman is to be joyful, be a symbol of joy and infect everyone around her with this joy. When a woman is joyful she shines like the Sun and is warm. That’s why everyone is pulled towards her like to a big mama. People want to be with her and warm up beside her. Together with her partner, a woman like this attracts positive events; positive vibrations always respond to the positive.

In Christianity there is a hymn to the most Holy Mother of God, the Hail Mary. It is so powerful that if you comprehend the meaning of the text you can see a rule for women’s happiness – the formula which women should strive towards which is the state of the Holy Mother.

A woman simply must not fall into despair or push herself into a depression, especially not when she is pregnant. And if at any point you find yourself forgetting about this and notice negative thoughts creeping into your mind, simply start reading this prayer.

Hail Mary²2
  This is the Russian Orthodox Hail Mary


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Virgin Mother of God, rejoice, Mary full of Grace, the Lord is with You; Blessed are you as a wife, and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, For you have given birth to the Saviour of our souls.

This is the most important prayer for all women. It has so many meanings that it can be reinterpreted over and over again. This is true woman’s wisdom.

Virgin Mother of God, rejoice! – women, rejoice!

Mary full of Grace – a woman gives grace and carries grace within herself.

The Lord is with You – and the Lord, Spirit, Power is with her.

Blessed are You as a wife – when a woman is with her husband she does not waste her energy on connections which are fated to be torn apart. She is with her one and only love whom she remains faithful to.

And blessed is the fruit of Thy womb — the Universe blesses a woman in pregnancy to give birth to a child. It blesses her fruit and helps her with everything by giving her the resources to give birth and bring up a healthy generation.

For you have given birth to the Saviour of our souls. – Every woman who gives birth to a child brings into the world the one who will teach her true love, humbleness and self-sacrifice. This way a child is called to cleanse and save the souls of her parents.

***

In other traditions we find the same thing. Have you noticed that all Chinese, Japanese, Tibetan and Indian gods are portrayed with large, relaxed stomachs and pregnant bellies? A large, relaxed belly speaks of balance, wisdom, sanctity, happiness and eternal life.

Week 8

Healthy clothing

You put your pants on in the morning and your soul feels carefree. But when you put them on now you feel how they squeeze your ever-growing belly…

Away with pants, and all clothes which constrict and squeeze! Pregnancy taught me to choose healthy things which didn’t pinch me anywhere or squeeze or put pressure on my female centres. I realized how important this is for a woman, especially if she wants to get pregnant and all the more so if she is pregnant already!

Remarkably, a year after giving birth fate brought me together with a unique person called Violetta. Not only did she confirm my discoveries in choosing clothes but she also deepened my knowledge on this topic to a great extent. And here in this chapter I want to share my findings with you.

Violetta has generously shared her unique materials and photographs of her collection.

Let’s start then…

***

Energy should flow freely,

For you to feel free,

For you to be healthy,

To flow with the Universe.

Let’s take a look back at what our ancestors used to wear. The first things that pop into mind are: long dresses and tunics, right? Nothing is constricted, it looks smart, and most importantly, woman remain connected to the earth through their lower centres.

It turns out that the tunic is much older than the dress. In ancient Rus, a father would wrap his tunic around his newborn which would act as the baby’s first swaddling clothes. It was believed that this was the strongest protection for a baby; it protected the baby from illness, symbolized continuity in the family line and emanated fatherly love. Of course I’m not calling you to put your dresses on immediately and throw your trousers away, though it would be cool if one day all women would walk the streets like that… A compromise can be found between the dictates of fashion and what is truly pleasant and good for the body – what can strengthen our female energy and make us feel even better.

Update

Well then, let’s to do a little spring cleaning in our wardrobes. If you’re ready of course…

You should choose your wardrobe with a lot of care. Don’t just look at the beauty and style of clothes but try to see whether they really suit you, your temperament, give you energy, and most importantly of all, how good does your body feel in them, what do you feel in them, how comfortable are you?

The first port of call is choosing underwear. In earlier times, women didn’t wear any underwear at all. Spiral flows of energy rose up into a woman’s womb while she walked helping to maintain her health and child-bearing potential. It is especially important to choose the right underwear because most modern pants, including G-strings, are designed in a way that makes them put pressure on the vagina, clitoris and sphincter. After a few hours of wearing such underwear everything begins to feel rubbed and sore. It’s best to throw these things away immediately without feeling any regret about it. As beautiful and expensive as they may be, a healthy womb, healthy ovaries and fallopian tubes are much more important in a woman’s life than false beauty.

Tight pants close off a woman’s two base centres. The first one is situated in the tailbone area. In the Slavonic tradition it is called Istok – the source. The name speaks for itself; a woman receives life energy through it. The second centre is called Zarod – Progeny. It is situated three fingers under the belly button and is responsible for birthing life. So if you have decided to go shopping for pants, make sure that the seams don’t go along or across this line. Pay special attention to the elastic bands. You need to choose pants with as loose a band as possible or without one whatsoever. And the fabric should be natural so that it feels pleasant for the skin. It’s better to get pants a size bigger than a size too small.

Bras…

Those of you with small breasts can afford to stop wearing bras altogether. What do you need them for? If you have large breasts then choose a bra made of soft fabric, which will mold to your breasts and not squeeze them in any way.

Clothing should flow together with your body and follow it, not the other way round.

Most bras are dangerous for your health, to put it bluntly. If you come home in the evening, and find the area under your breasts, your back and shoulders covered in red lines after taking your bra off, then it’s better for you to get rid of it.

Many women with small breasts choose push up bras. This isn’t very good for their health either. Accept your breasts as they are. In any case, your chosen one will see them sooner or later without a bra. Why mislead people? Sacrificing your health is unnecessary and in the end won’t even be taken into account. You’re more use for yourself and others as a healthy woman. Accept yourself. Love your body the way it is, the way that nature made it.

Jeans…

The last time I was putting on some tight jeans, I suddenly realized what they do to our body, how they torment it by constricting the stomach, hips, legs, and most importantly of all, our female sexual organs! The body cannot breathe through denim. It has no way of expanding, barely noticeably with each inhalation. The stomach shows these pulsations best of all. When we breathe in, the stomach wants to expand, and on the out-breath it deflates. When we eat food the stomach expands and after going to the toilet it gets slightly smaller. But most types of jeans and trousers do not follow the movements of our body, because they are too rigid. Skirts, trousers, tunics, leggings are much more attractive and don’t constrict anything. There you have it! A new outlook on clothing. I’ll talk about skirts later on.

Even a small detail in your wardrobe such as the type of socks you have is also important. If the elastic puts too much pressure on your shin bone it’s better to stretch it or cut it off altogether. The same goes for any other type of clothing. Many women feel ashamed of their fulsome figures and buy constricting clothing in an attempt to hide them. Their bodies are trapped by ropes, corsets, elastic bands. Why feel so little love for oneself? If you really feel so uncomfortable about your weight then it’s better to start eating healthily and doing physical exercise. By compressing your body you compress yourself, your potential and restrict your life. I would recommend choosing loose tunics with beautiful eye-catching patterns, dresses that cascade freely over your body making a mystery of what’s hidden underneath them…

Another important aspect of choosing clothing for the cold months of the year: choose clothing which is very warm! No nylon tights in winter! Wear woolen leggings and tights, which cover your stomach and lower back, and long, warm skirts and dresses. In the winter wrap a shawl or warm scarf around your waist. The cold is wily in that once it makes its way into our body, it begins to take away our body’s energy and weaken the organism. It eats away at our resources until finally something inside us gives way. Usually this is a place which was already weak. Healers smoke out cold from the body with the help of incense e.g. Copal, which has a pleasant smell of tree resin. They make spirals with the lit incense stick around the area which has become cold until the healing smoke’s warmth penetrates it.

Female centres in particular need to be kept warm because they are very open to everything. On the one hand this allows us to feel the world better, but on the other hand, we can sometimes be too accessible and unprotected; our female tunnel can let things into our body unhampered.